Category: Movies

The Magic Kid 1 & 2 (-)

Wow amazing fantastic. Remember in the 90s how every and any kid movie was somehow ninja related. Remember those movies where the adults can’t fight for beans and all the kids kick their asses? Well The Magic Kid series is no different, but the fact of the matter is that these two films are horrible. The first one is the kind of movie that leaves a stench in your mouth. While its sequel is just as bad, it’s the type of film that makes you chuckle at its crappy quality. For some reason Howie Mandel and William Daniels make an appearance in the sequel.

Both films have no idea who their target audience is. Within the first 15 minutes in the first film they are talking about sex. Considering that this movie is meant for young kids, do you really think that sex should be mentioned anywhere?

These two films are the types of film that you ask yourself: where’s the remote? But then you realize that you’re too lazy to find it so you keep on watching. After half an hour passes by you either fall asleep or start throwing something at the screen to try and break it – as if you are destroying the film. Sadly all that you’re doing is destroying a perfectly fine TV that will cost you thousands of dollars to repair.

Eat it.

Slither (+)

I don’t feel like making a video review nor writing an entire review so here it goes:

See this movie if you like monster movies – gross movies – movies that are funny – movies that remind you of other movies – movies that make you say “Shit!”

If you like any of the above types of movies you will like Slither! It’s all of those and more. Old school alien invasion movie with tons of awesome creatures and story twists.

LARPing AND God of War? Surely you jest.

I wish I were joking about it, but it’s true, as sad as it is. To promote Sony’s new game, God of War II, SCEA put together a little LARPing(Live Action Role Playing, think D&D minus the dice, plus the foam swords) event staring some of the stars of the God of Wars games, and just some that are fun. You get to pit 10 different characters against each other, ranging from mythological classics such as the Medusa, Colossus of Rhodes, and Zeus, to Sony originals such as Kratos, and Chubby Kratos.

The battles range from sad, to train crashes, to hilarious. Watch it, you might want to look away, but it’s like a Pringle. Once you pop, the fun don’t stop.

Quick! Cast +4 hilarity!

Hitman The Movie – Now in Production

20th Century Fox appears to be the studio behind it. Check out the fulll press release in The Pipeline under the News section!

God I love video game based movies! It’ll be interesting to see how this one turns out. As long as it’s better than BloodRayne we have a winner!

Here’s an excerpt:
The game’s story centers around an international assassin known only as Agent 47 (Olyphant) who works for a mysterious organization dubbed the Agency. The Hitman videogames have sold in excess of 6 million units worldwide, with the most recent instalment, Hitman: Blood Money selling 1.4 million units worldwide and reaching No.1 in all key territories.

The movie is being directed by Xavier Gens from a screenplay by Skip Woods (Swordfish) and produced by Luc Besson, Pierre-Ange Le Pogam, Adrian Askarieh and Charles Gordon with Daniel Alter as a co-producer.

We Like Movies

The Pipeline is expanding into new waters! We’re working on several new shows that will expand the potential audience of The Pipeline greatly. The first new show to start us off is called ‘Movie Clips.’ From the name I’m sure you can guess what kind of video content it contains.

As of right now this show features a mash-up of video clips from:
Are We There Yet?
Bridge To Terabithia
Meet The Robinsons
Dead Silence